Diary of a Separation
On the road to a better relationship (first and foremost with myself)
Wednesday 30th January 2019
Cursed is the relationship where one party becomes the lodger in a shared home. Not in a rent-paying kind of way. But in a distance-generated way. That certainly happened between S and me. I became the housemate. I woke up today thinking that as our children grew up and started withdrawing from our communal spaces to the privacy of their rooms, I, too, created a gap between my wife and me.
My fear is that I could make a similar mistake in the future. I know this is unlikely, as I’ve learnt a lot about myself, my flaws and my aspirations in these almost-two-years since S and I split up. But as I crank up a gear and go in search of that person I would ultimately like to spend the rest of my life with (or, failing that, a huge chunk of it), I listen to the little voice in my head telling me to keep both my feet on the ground. Is Ao that person? It remains to be seen.
